Family Mission Statement

"The Mission of the Anderson Family is to become and do all things necessary to be exalted as a family. To prepare for heaven, we will create a 'heaven on earth' by maintaining: A home where the spirit dwells, a home of LOVE, a home of FAITH, a home of ORDER, a home of LEARNING, a home of HEALTH, a home of WORK, and a home of PLAY-- where we are united in our obedience to God and enjoy true happiness."

Tuesday, August 28, 2018

21 Day Book of Mormon Reading Challenge

If you want to get into the best habit every- read the Book of Mormon every day.
Here is a list of readings for 21 days (it takes 21 days to establish a habit)

21 Day Book of Mormon Reading Challenge
 _____1. 1Nephi 3:5-7, 4:1-18, ch8, ch11 (Gold Plates+ Lehi’s Dream)
_____2. 1Nephi 12-14 (Lehi’s Dream+Latter-day Prophecies)
_____3. 2Nephi 2 (The Fall)
_____4. 2Nephi 4, 2Nephi 5   (Nephi’s lament + manner of happiness)
_____5. 2 Nephi 9 (The Resurrection)
_____6. Jacob 2, Enos 1: 1-8 (Pride+ Chastity, Repentance)
_____7. Mosiah 2-3  (King Benjamin)
_____8. Mosiah 4-5 (King Benjamin)
_____9. Alma 5 (Pride Self Assessment)
_____10. Alma 17:1-3, Alma 22 (Teaching the King)
_____11. Alma 32-34 (the seed)
_____12. Alma 36 (Alma’s conversion)
_____13. Alma 39-42 (Repent + Plan)
_____14. Alma 24, Alma 53:10-22, 56:47-48, 57:21, Alma 48
             (People of Ammon + Captain Moroni)
_____15. Helaman 3:20-32, Helaman ch5 (Rock Redeemer)
_____16. Helaman 13-15 (Samuel the Lamanite)
_____17. 3 Nephi 11-14 (Savior in America)
_____18. 3 Nephi 17-19 (Savior in America)
_____19. Mormon 8-9 (Book of Mormon prophecies, repent)
_____20. Ether 2-4, ch12  (Brother Jared, Faith)
_____21. Moroni ch7, ch10 (Gifts, Charity, Promise)

Thursday, March 29, 2018

Easter Eggs with Scriptures

This year we taped scriptures about Christ on our Easter eggs 
for the kids to memorize before they eat the candy inside.  
I picked a scripture from each topic in the Book of Mormon index 
under the title "Jesus Christ." 
 Here is the link to the scripture list:

Wednesday, November 8, 2017

ANGER- A Cause or An Effect?

I've always thought I had an ANGER problem,
but after reading "Bonds That Make us Free" by C. Terry Warner,
I have learned that when I handle things wrong, I feel angry as a result.

Negative feelings are a sign that I CHOOSE THE WRONG or ignored a spiritual prompting.
(By choosing the wrong, I mean being rude or impatient or justice-oriented).

When CHOOSE THE RIGHT, We feel Positive Feelings= PEACE and LOVE.
(CTR by handling each moment in the Right or Best Way, or following a prompting)
By choosing the right (being kind, loving, patient), we PREVENT anger.
This is so much easier than trying to calm down or get rid of anger.

If we do choose the wrong, all isn't lost...
the Spirit/Holy Ghost can help us see the RIGHT thing to do NOW.
(Like a Navigator- redirecting our course to get us back on track)
So, we don't have to stay in a negative mood.
We get out by choosing the right or best now.

I drew a diagram of the brain, showing that in each moment,  
if we choose the right, our thoughts go on an upper track and the outcome is positive feelings.
If we choose the wrong, our thoughts go on a negative track and we feel negative feelings.

Saturday, September 16, 2017

Book of Mormon Read-A-Thon

We had an awesome experience last week reading the whole Book of Mormon with the young women in our ward Friday afternoon/evening and Saturday all day.
We listened to a sped up version (45%) and it takes 19.5 hours + meal and snack breaks.
It really strengthened my testimony of Christ and helped me see overview themes -
1- Repent and believe in Christ
2- Beware of Pride
3- Christ will deliver us- both now and eternally
4- Give to the poor. Pray for Charity
5- When we obey God he blesses/prospers us

Here's our schedule:
(Sadie helped give good ideas every couple of hours to keep it from being monotonous-
read aloud together, color, cut and paste in scripture mastery cards)
Also, our Bishop came and read a King Benjamin chapter
and our Young Men came and acted/read a Captain Moroni chapter

Sunday, July 2, 2017

Pioneer Trek

This summer we got to go on pioneer trek.
It was an A+ experience- spiritual, meaningful, fun.
The leaders organized it so well and everyone consecrated their talents.
I was in charge of the music, activities, and delegating the teaching of the stories.

One thing we did was make Ash Cakes:ash cake recipe
This is a pioneer food I loved when I went on trek as a youth.
You mix up the dough, then make patties, then place them on hot coals
Cook (5 min on each side), then serve with honey.
(Modern days= you cook it in the oven for 10 min, flip, 5 more minutes)

Makes 32  
8 c. flour       
4 t. salt   
4 T. baking powder
1/2 c. oil or butter
2 c. water (+1/2c if using butter)

-Annie I Over
-Don't Touch the Bucket
-Flour Sack Relay Race (Youth)
-3 Legged Race (Ma's & Pa's)

DANCES:   This is an awesome website: geslisongroberg
1. Virginia Reel
2. Heel Toe (Cotton Eye Joe)
3. O Susanna
4. O Johnny O
5. The Handcart Song
6. Cumberland Squares
8. Zipper
9. Highland Fling (to Bagpipes)

Fireside Week Before: "Come Take Your Place" by Hilary Weeks
1st Morning Devotional: "I am a child of God"
6th Crossing/Eminence: "The Spirit of God"
Levi Savage Presentation: "I'll Go Where you want me to Go"
Campfire: "I'm Trying to Be Like Jesus"
Jens & Elsie reenactment: "Sweet Hour of Prayer/Ask in Faith"
Women's Pull: "As Sisters in Zion"
Ephraim Hanks: "I feel my Savior's Love"  
Fireside: "Come Come ye Saints" (harmonica) + "I feel my Savior's Love" solo
River crossing: "Come Come Ye Saints (violin)
Rescue Bridge: "As Zion's Youth" 
Rescue Statues: "'We'll Bring the World His Truth/As Sisters in Zion"
Martin's Cove: Harmonica before devotional;  Violin playing on hill as enter cove walk
Veil Crossing Bridge: "Love one Another"
Dan Jones: "God Be with you" (harmonica)
Fireside: "As Zion's Youth" (guitar)
Rock Creek Hollow: "Praise to the Man" + "Amazing Grace"



Friday, April 21, 2017

Obedience/Respect Training & Family Chores

1. OBEDIENCE (receive instructions & obey quickly)
2. SACRIFICE (accept no answers & do duty before play)
3. LOVE (disagree respectfully, don’t emotionally or physically abuse people or property)
4. CLEANLINESS (Clean body & room and Leave no trace- tidy up after yourself)

4 BASIC SKILLS PARENTS should develop:
  1. Teach “WHY” (give the reason) before the “what” (the instruction or no answer).  Always use persuasion, kindness, pure knowledge. This will prevent yourself from being a dictator. Children need to be TRAINED in respect- it doesn’t come naturally. TEACH them to right way to receive an instruction, accept a no answer, or accept a consequence (Role play looking at the parent in the eyes with a calm face and saying “yes mom” then going and doing it)... AND how to make an appeal (calmly ask the parent to reconsider their decision with an idea the child has thought of that they think is more fair).... THEN when they do ask to make an appeal, LISTEN and consider it if at all possible. (Beware of pride).
(Then patiently re-teach in every situation until it becomes a habit.  High in expectations & love)
  1. Be Generous and caring about the welfare and happiness of your children. Before you give a No answer, first consider if you could possibly say “yes.”  ALSO, Be Generous in Rewards and SMALL with consequences to TRAIN not PUNISH.
  2. LISTEN until you understand them fully before you give a consequence (Seek first to understand, then to be understood).Consequence right and wrong not preferences or annoyances. Use programs as tools to teach not weapons to punish. Don't revile back when they are rude to you. Stay calm when they are upset and let them talk- help them think through solutions. Don't punish them for the way they treat you-return good for evil-turn the other cheek. Consequence their fights with each other, but don't consequence their rudeness to you or you are modeling it's ok to fight back.
  3. Be meek/easy to be entreated... Always listen and consider their appeal if they can make it with a soft heart and a soft voice. Be agreeable and a peacemaker.

4 BASIC SKILLS CHILDREN should develop:
  1. Receive an Instruction (Calm face, look eyes, say yes mom, go and do, report back)
“Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.” (Ephesians 6:1)
  1. Accept a No Answer (Calm face, look eyes, say OK, drop it- no arguing)
  2. Accept a Consequence (Calm face, look eyes, say OK, drop it- no arguing)
  3. Disagree Appropriately (Soft heart & voice, ask if they can make an appeal= suggest another fair idea for parent to consider)

A. NO PRIVILEGES (Red Light) before any work is done
B. BASIC PRIVILEGES (Yellow Light) are earned when their 5 daily chores (rocks) are done.
  1. Play Inside  2. Play Outside   3. Play with Friends  4. Read extra books for fun alone or with family
*Our five daily chores are:
1. Family Scriptures   2. Clean Body & Room   3. Breakfast Clean up   4. Family Scriptures   5. Family Chore  
-If kids start playing or take off without their daily chores being done, I teach them the rock/sand principle and kindly ask them to get their chores done first. (kindness, patience, pure knowledge).  I remind them that they haven’t earned their yellow light/basic play privileges yet.  (I even have golf balls with those 5 topics written on them for them to put in a jar after they do each chore)
-For clean body and room, I have cards they turn over when they are done with each task.  The cards have pictures for make bed, say prayers, shower, get dressed, brush hair, brush teeth, tidy room, tidy bathroom. These have to be done before they can eat breakfast.
C. FULL PRIVILEGES (Green Light) are earned when they their daily chores are completely done, if they have a respectful +obedient attitude, and any consequences for hurting others have​ been met. (They are at the privilege line)
  1. Stay up/Evening activities (honor thy father & mother that thy days may be long in the land)
  2. Outings/Extra Privileges
  3. Technology (games have limits though- only learning games and minutes have to be earned by piano or reading classics)
  4. Sugar/Treats

  1. PERSUASION- first teach, explain, try to soften their heart to obey
  2. REPAIR injuries- if they abuse someone or something they have to repair/repay in a way parents agree.
  3. REMOVE PRIVILEGES- if they cannot be persuaded and refuse to obey/accept consequence/no answer (are out of instructional control and totally hard hearted) they may need to lose privileges.  (We have a privilege line with a chart of squares underneath it that their magnet moves below.  We give the instruction/consequence/no answer 3 times to test their obedience.  Each time they cannot receive it, they drop a square below the privilege line- up to 3 askings- which means they will have to do 3 obedience instructions/jobs for that situation and any others that they cannot receive afterwards IN ADDITION to their original 5 chores in order to get to full green light privileges (otherwise, they stay at yellow light level). If they were rude or disrespectful to a sibling, they drop below acc to degree of injury and serve that sibling (not parents) to move up.
(Yellow light and Green Light are like the 3 degrees of glory- disobedient choose to live at a lower level of privileges)
  1. REMOVE the PERSON- if they are blocking others from their tasks or disturbing the family activity, they may need to be removed (i.e. to their room) for the good of the whole until the activity is over.
1. Children can help provide for the physical needs of their families by helping their parents with their work, studying well in school, taking care of their clothing and other possessions, keeping themselves and their home clean and neat, and maintaining good health. (FAMILY GUIDEBOOK)
2. Order is essential in the heavens; if it were otherwise, chaos would rule. Order is just as necessary in our homes. President Kimball said, “Plan well and carry out your plan in an orderly and systematic manner”
3. Connect Work & Food... Gen 3:19 In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto the ground; 2 Thessalonians 3:10 For even when we were with you, we gave you this rule: "If a man will not work, he shall not eat.  (We have learned to just withhold snacks that day if they refuse to do their food chore, unless they do a makeup food chore so they don’t have any basic need un-met and feel abused/neglected… we also don’t allow snacks if meals aren’t eaten)
4. Connect Work & Money… “Have a simple family economy where children have specific chores or household duties and receive praise or other rewards commensurate to how well they do. Teach them the importance of avoiding debt and of earning, saving, and wisely spending money. Help them learn responsibility for their own temporal and spiritual self-reliance.”- Elder Ballard
5. Connect Work and Privileges… If homework isn't done, technology can be withheld. “The connection has to do with work and privileges. Watching television is a privilege that is earned by being responsible. A child who is irresponsible can lose a privilege.” (strengthening the family course- applying consequences)

1. WHAT our Family Chores are:
Each day they only have one family chore (in addition to helping with every meal clean up)
It rotates by day, but stays the same for each child each week. If you don’t have 6 kids, put yourself in the gaps
Child #
Cook Bfast
Cook Lunch
Cook Dinner
Yard  (repair/piano winter)
Mon                     Tues            Wed              Thur               Fri                     Sat
Mon                     Tues            Wed              Thur               Fri                     Sat
Mon                     Tues            Wed              Thur               Fri                     Sat
Mon                     Tues            Wed              Thur               Fri                     Sat
Mon                     Tues            Wed              Thur               Fri                     Sat
Mon                     Tues            Wed              Thur               Fri                     Sat

2. HOW we PAY for family CHORES:
A. Work earns FOOD  (by the sweat of thy brow, thou shalt eat thy bread all the days of thy life)
If they refuse to do their food work (cooking or gardening), they don’t eat that meal. They help pick the meal that they cook- (we have pretty much the same meals each day of the week)
B. Work earns MONEY  (I am a homemaker, so I pay them for their housework job + their laundry job. They then have to pay 10% tithing and 10% savings, the rest goes towards clothes, fun, or extra learning (if they want to do a sport, they pay half) They sign up for housework at the beginning of the month and do the same job each week on their housework day. I pay $2 for them to wash, dry, fold, + put away their own laundry.
*Our weekly housework assignments are:
    1- Clean kitchen appliances ($1),   2- Vacuum Vehicles ($3),  3- Mop Kitchen Floor ($1-2),
    4-Vacuum House + Stairs ($3),   5- Clean Bathrooms ($6)    6-Wipe Furniture (couches, piano, desk) (50c)
*Our weekly yardwork assignment is to care for their garden+sign up for a different part of the yard for pay:
    1- Mow Lawn ($4 whole lawn or $1/section)    2- Edge Lawn ($2)       3- Weed Around House ($4 or $1/side)
                         4- Pick up Yard ($1)            5- Straighten & Sweep Garage ($2)
*We pay them once a week (every Saturday)
C. WORK develops TALENTS:  Piano or Repair Job in winter - they can choose.  If they choose piano, they pass off one song a week- on their piano day. If they choose repair, I give them something that needs to be done that week.
D. All Work earns PRIVILEGES (Work before Play- do your duty first)
*Every child helps with meal clean up- I started by training them in the one that is their level.
Once everyone was do everything, we made a daily rotation.  (Many hands makes light work)
    1- Wash Dishes   2- Load Dishwasher  3- Dry Dishes  4- Sweep Floor   5- Wipe Table   6- Wipe Island/Stove

- If they leave anything out and I pick it up, I put it in a DI bag in the garage.
I take it to the DI once a month and let them look first to see if they want to buy anything out. (25c/item)

-If they want it before the DI check, they can buy it out early for 25c or an extra 5 min job

Friday, July 29, 2016

Family Laws

1. WORK        
Family Laws and Pre-Set Consequences help me to keep high expectations without using anger to motivate.  For years, I have used the phrase that work earns food, which was motivating, but sometimes it contradicted the basic duty of parents to providing food for their children- since it is a necessity of life.   We tried work earning play and work earning money which sometimes worked and sometimes didn't.  All year I have been struggling over what the family law should be... does work earn food or play or money?  I had an "a-ha" one night that it earns all 3!

Some work earns *FOOD (such as their assignment for helping prepare or grow the food)
1 exception-- they have to have a clean body and room before breakfast everyday.
(They are in charge of setting their own alarms + getting up and ready before family scripture study)
Some work earns PLAY/privileges (personal duties like their **family chore and homework)
They cannot go outside, play with friends, use technology, etc until their chore is done.
Some work earns ***MONEY (house/yard work that lightens parents' responsibilities)
I made a list of house and yardwork that needs to be done weekly and but a price on it that I was willing to pay them and let them sign up.  They kept it for the whole month long.

*Since I have 6 kids, they each help cook on their assigned breakfast day, lunch day, and dinner day. Sunday is cereal and leftovers or I cook. If they refuse to do their meal, they cannot eat that meal that day... it never happens.  My kids love helping me cook-they plan the meal with me so it's nutritious and something they like.  This way I don't have to restrict their food anymore. As long as they are willing to help cook, they can eat as much as they want. If the meal runs out, I just stay loaded with carrots, bread, milk, eggs, peanut butter as options to fill up or snack on.

**They only have one family chore a day.  It's either their breakfast day, their housework day, their lunch day, their laundry day, their dinner day, or their yardwork day.

***They earn money from, but they have to budget and pay for their own clothes, extra learning (½ sports), and fun.

I have been in massive training this summer with obedience, respect, and emotional control.
My goal is to be super kind yet not permissive of disrespect and defiance.
I've tried time outs, but what if the child is too big to take to time out or won't go?
This is the system we have worked out: (It is tough, but worth it)

There are 4 basic skills that children should have while interacting with parents
(This is from a book called, A House United)
1. Receive and Instruction (say "yes mom" and quickly obey and report back)
2. Receive a *Consequence (say "yes mom" and quickly do the consequence)
(jobs are not the consequence, they are a result of not receiving a consequence... see below for natural consequence ideas)
3. Receive a No Answer (say "yes mom" and drop the topic- no whining)
4. Disagree Appropriately (say "yes mom, may I suggest an idea I think is more fair" arguing)

If they cannot receive an instruction, consequence, or a no answer then I tell them they are 1 square below the privilege line. (which means they owe me 1 small job or act of obedience)
I then give the instruction a 2nd time.  If they don't receive and do it, they drop 2 more squares below the privilege line.
I then give the instruction a 3rd time.  If they don't receive and do it, they drop 3 more squares below the privilege line.

Usually they will obey an instruction by the 3rd time, if not- I just drop the topic and they have no privileges until they've done 30 minutes of work for refusing that instruction.  In the meantime, if I have to give different instructions before they have earned those back, they can drop even more if they don't obey those instructions.   The quicker they soften their heart, the quicker they get privileges back.  I give them a list of jobs to chose from.  They can pick from my 5 minute job list (1 square), my 20 minute job list (4 squares), or my 60 minute job lists (12 squares).  They can also move up a square every time they obey an instruction right away that I give one out naturally.

*Consequence ideas:
-Don’t eat meal= Don’t get snacks
-Eat before prayer=wait 5 minutes to eat.
-Fight over toy/game=lose toy or pulled out of game for a period of time
-Name calling/verbal abuse= say 10 kind words or write letter of forgiveness + kindness or soap in mouth (swearing)
-Hurt someone=time out
-Bad for babysitter=pay babysitter